About me

I thought about doing a proper biog bit, like the blurb you get in books. You know the sort of thing I mean - how the author got a double first at Cambridge, married well and has two tremendously attractive children and a nice house in Notting Hill.

But as I don't have any of those things, apart from marrying well of course, I've just gone with a poor quality head and shoulders shot and a mercifully brief interview with myself. I think it does the trick.

My life & assorted nonsense

Where were you born?
I was born in the UK. The Midlands to be exact. My sister's bed to be even more exact. I must make a mental note to thank her.

What was your childhood like (and please be brief)?
It was a strange mix. Being a pasty-skinned, ginger-haired kid tends to put something of a crimp in your school days. But growing up in small rural villages did have its advantages, not least as the inspiration for the setting of my first novel.

A novel? It's not some thinly-disguised autobiographical toss about being bullied and finding love in a haystack is it?
No.

What happened when you left school?
Specifically I forgot to take my bicycle with me because I was drunk - not interesting but true. More generally I went on to get a degree in this and that from the university of somewhere or other, tried to be a musician, couldn't make enough money so became a journalist instead. Look, can we get onto more recent events please, you're making me feel old.

Okay then, when did you start writing?
I started with poetry, some so bad it had to be destroyed in a controlled explosion, and then began writing comedy sketches for the now defunct Radio 4 show Weekending before co-writing a sitcom pilot for the BBC and contributing to a Radio 4 sketch show pilot. Unfortunately neither were turned into a series.

Don't stop now, I'm fascinated. No really I am. Honest.
After a hiatus for a few years, I started writing short stories. My first was published on East of the Web, an excellent short story website. The second won £500 in a writing competition sponsored by Orange. The third was rejected, soon to be followed by the fourth, but I kept going and have listed some of my writing credits elsewhere on the site.

Thanks for sharing. Having you done anything remotely interesting?
You're really quite rude aren't you?

Sure, but I'm asking the questions, so crack on.
A couple of years ago, my very supportive and indulgent wife and I ditched our jobs, left our house with some tenants who promised they weren't arsonists and travelled the world for a year.

Please don't tell me you wrote a travel book about your experiences when you got back.
I wrote a book about our travel experiences when we got back. Despite being incredibly lazy in trying to get it published - after an initial burst of enthusiasm - I've actually got interest from a couple of publishers. In the meantime, there's probably an extract from the book somewhere on this site if I've remembered to put it up.

And what's your current writing project?
The novel I mentioned earlier. Plus more short stories.

Do you do anything else apart from placing words on pages?
I play football and the guitar, though rarely all at the same time.

I think that's enough biographical details now, don't you?
Oh yes.

Quote:

"Writing is the only profession where no-one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money." Jules Renard